Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage...

When you've only heard about a author, but not read any of his works, you've all kind of speculations in your mind. What if it turns out to be one of those stories with all those big words about life & philosophy , where you can't relate to the story..??
It gets recommended to you in a book club so you read it anyways, but the best part is when that book exceed your expectations & blows your mind away...
'Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki..' is basically centered around the theme of closure & tsukuru's journey of finally finding it & accepting it.
When the protagonist of the book 'Tsukuru' decides to introspect his life, his past, his friendship, he so effortlessly takes you along in that journey...you can almost feel every emotion he feels with the turn of events & when the truth of all that happened in his past is revealed to him.
He is as clueless about the plot as you , and after discovering the truth he finds the closure he's been looking for and somehow as a reader you find yours too..

Tsukuru never found all the answers he was looking for...the reason his world came to pieces 16 years ago was all because of a lie, but he never found out why him & he never will...But that's what life is...you find some answers & the rest of it you just have to let go...

Maybe you'll feel the tiny disappointment of not knowing about what happens with Tsukuru's romantic plot with Sara. But that's ok...The sutle romance plot was beautifully integrated with the story...And the story was all about finding closure...dealing with your past & letting it go.

Haruki Murakami told this story with the simplest words but larger than life emotions... Each of us has a role to play, some of our colors to someone's lives & others are those colorless vessel which everyone needs around them to store their emotions & make them feel at home.

well, it was worth being #TSBCChallenge...can't wait for another one & read something as spectacular as this.

It wasn't just Cricket...

This isn’t a tribute to Sachin, lord knows I’m not the eloquent or a great writer who can seize his greatness in my words.
This is just to express those emotions, which were expressed by millions today in those tears.

Millions of people, with moist eyes, bidding farewell to the great Sachin Ramesh Tendulkar.
But what are they crying for? Is it because they won’t see India win again, they won’t see some records breaking or some great innings. That’s not it, and Rohit & Pujara proved so.
The show will go on. But maybe that’s all it’s going to be from now on. A show!

For the past decade or so, Cricket has always been in limelight. For scandals, controversies, etc.
But people always defended the game, always using the similar expression. “Don’t blame the game, Sachin has been playing it for a long time now and he has always been fair.” People never lost faith in the game as long as he was a part of it. He gave them a sense of hope, relief and faith.



There is a reason why every mother adores him, why our grandparents are so fond of him, why the youth worshipped him.
It wasn’t just Cricket, It can’t be.

It was his passion, his nature, his humbleness, his regards for the game but most of all it was his soul, the purity of his soul, which even after achieving so much, people can still connect to.
As a son, who wanted to fulfill his parents’ dream. As a parent who wants his children to be proud of him. But above all, as a boy, who just wanted to chase his dream & play.

Not being a serious cricket fan, Sachin might not have been a God to me, but he was the soul of the game.
I am one of those billions of fan, who got inspired by Sachin.
I got inspired everytime he came to play, by watching him play with all his heart. He played with the hopes of millions counting on him. Most of the time he made those dreams come true, sometimes he failed. But, the fact that he tried everytime with so much sincerity & dedication was so inspiring.

Cricket is always going to be a part of him, like he said ‘its oxygen to him’.

He might not play for india anymore, but somehow I get the feeling, he’ll be playing anyways, for his son, for the younger generation. Not only teaching them the techniques but the lessons Cricket & his life taught him.

“He retired from the game, not from his greatness.”

love that was once unknown...

There are a few moments in an individual’s life when they find themselves completely speechless. Not out of happiness or when they are doomed, just speechless!
Holding my niece in my arms for the first time was that kind of moment for me. She was barely 10 days old, and considering my record with babies, it was risky. But my family forced me to take it anyways, and for them it was a sight to behold. Although I kept my posture in a statue position but inside I was trembling and had goose bumps all over.

All my life, I might not have detested kids, but I preferred to keep a safe distance from them. All those nonsensical endless talks, tantrums, endless demands have always irritated me. I always thought that I lacked the pampering gene required to deal with kids. I used to adore them in photos only, and in person I glared them (when no one was looking) so they won’t come to me.

But holding her & watching her sleep (after I surpassed all that fuss), felt ecstatic to me. And by the end of the day I felt the love towards her that was unknown to me. I wanted her to wake up & notice me, to recognize me, although I was afraid whether I’ll be able to handle her. (b’coz that was a real test, since with all the crying n all). But a day passed and then another and I realized that all my anxiety was senseless. I won’t be bragging if I say that ‘gudda’ (what I lovingly call her) is the sincere most child I’ve ever seen. Apart from her milk-feeding and nappy-changing time, she never cries.

Singing her lullabies, nursery rhymes, making her do exercise & dance, talking to her the whole day, telling her all kind of silly stories was the best job I had in years.
Even her cries didn’t irritate me anymore, and instead of running away I used to calm her down.(surprisingly I succeeded most of the times.) being around her was very relaxing, she had an aura around her which is hard to describe. I guess all kids must have that, considering the innocence they have….

A week or two later, I was her officially favorite aunt(although only nidhi di agrees with this). Well, nothing pleased me more. The ability to make her sleep apart from nidhi di(her mother) felt like a super-power.
Having the best features of her parents, she’s the prettiest child ever. Unlike her parents, I might not have to think about her academics, future and all, but there’s so much more I want to share with her, thing about life I want to teach her. Fairytales, bed-time stories with morals I want to narrate or write for her.

Whenever I hold her, I can feel the bond b/w us.  And even if we’ll meet 3-4 times a year in future, I never want that bond to fade…me being her favourite aunt(i am!! ignoring what my cousins say), she being the person I love and care about the most.

-for you aashi, ‘an angel who changed my perception’                                   
you may read this years later, but I want you to know that how I felt from the time I first lay my eyes on you.
love you dear…always have, always will…. 

the classroom of sundays :)

‘BEEP BEEP!!!! ‘Gone are the days when these words on TV meant the road runner outsmarting the coyote…

Long ago (or what it seems like), Sundays weren’t seen as a day of sleeping till noon!!

Instead, we woke up early to enjoy an hour full of cartoons… (Well they were worth waking up for!!).I am not referring to a horde of channels but 60 min in entire week!

 

Our parents also used it as the best bait to make us complete our homework, clean our rooms and even for a little help in the household. A whole week’s good behavior was to ensure us that we’ll have the remote for that hour. I bet now a day’s kids won’t understand all this fuss over some cartoons, and certainly not the good behavior part…coz all they do is throw a tantrum, not surprising though since they regularly watch a kid do the same on TV. We lived in a different dimension all-together.

 Wind back your life 10-15 yrs in the past & you’ll know what I’m speaking of, well it seems like the end of an era now (the innocent one as a matter of fact)…

It seems like all that was required to know about life, we learned by watching them.

Popeye taught us never to be afraid of bullies and also the reason our moms were able to trick us into green vegetables.

Aladdin showed us to be brave & fearless.

Science actually seemed fun while watching Dexter’s laboratory.

Huey, Dewey & Louie (d three famous brothers in duck tales) taught us that siblings are your best friends and thus stick together.

In all time favorite tom n jerry, we discovered the unseen friendship despite of all those fights.

Chip n dale proved that no matter how small you are, you can still rock on!!

Mickey Mouse taught us to value friends and be happy, whereas watching Donald duck we learned to control our anger.

Well, I can go on with this forever…

Sometimes we think that today’s children have so much, but surf a few hours through their cartoons & you’ll realize who the lucky one is. Trust me, a kid trying to act smart along with a couple of double meaning jokes…hellooo… not funny!!!

The essence or to be precise the innocence seems to have lost. The fairytales with a hope of happy ending, or an episode with a morale of goodness over evil. Those were the basic roots for optimism, decency and the qualities which a child should imbibe in him/her.

We might not have all those cool gadgets, clothes, accessories, but we had something that our after generation will never have…. a childhood!!

Cheers for the blissful time we spent watching them all….

 

p.s.: I guess cartoon creators need to start smoking pot & tripping on acid again so we can have quality cartoons like Scooby doo & the gummy bears again!! (Well, whatever it takes ;))

                   

when i miss you the most...

I rest on my bed, after working all day

I crave for your embrace & realize your absence

The distance troubles me thus a tear is shed

That’s when I miss you the most maa…

With each dawn, I miss your wakeup call

Food not tempting & taste is not the usual

It lacks your taste of love

The damn oil is no more relaxing

I miss your serene touch on my head,

For my comfort you worked all day

Dead beat, you still made my bed….

I miss those talks while you tucked me in

Tales you told and lessons you taught

Sounds of chores while singing those songs,

Surrounds me when I’m all alone,

Your scolding, your love

Your anger, your care…

When I’m sick, lying all by myself

I miss you always being at my side,

When feeling alone, no words to share

I miss the warmth of your lap,

Sometimes so much word yet no one understands

I miss how u even felt my silence…

When I get hurt, sometimes even bleed n cry,

I miss the touch which healed it all..

When I call your name & no one answers,

That’s when I miss you the most maa…

Every minute which passes by & I don’t find you around,

That’s when I miss you the most maa…

वो यारों की महफ़िल...

जब भी यादों में पाया उन्हें

ये कदम ठहर से गए...

उन पलों को महसूस करके

ये फिज़ा थम सी गई...

न जाने क्या बात थी

उस यारो की महफ़िल में..

ज़हन में आज भी वो यादें बरक़रार है

खुदमे यु रूठना -मनाना

देर तक यु बातें बनाना..

किसी के दर्द में, अश्क अपनी पलकों से बहाना

कुछ गलती होने पे, गालियाँ देके फिर साथ निभाना..

वो शायद कुछ और ही समां था..

जब ये दिल एक दूजे के लिए धड़कते थे

कल क्या होगा, इससे बेखबर 

बस आज में जिया करते थे...

कल तक जिस दुनिया से बेखबर थे

आज उसी की भीड़ में कहीं खो गए है..

उन तमाम कसमो-वादों के बावजूद

आज फिर भी सबसे दूर हो गए है..

जो पीछे छूट गया है

वो खुदका एक हिस्सा सा लगता है..

अब किसी भी महफ़िल में जाएं

ज़िन्दगी का वो अंश अधूरा सा लगता है..

हंसी के वो पल ...

रात की गहराई में 

जब दिल ने खुदको तनहा पाया

कुछ मानो छुट गया हो पीछे

उन तारो ने ये एहसास दिलाया...

बिछड़े कुछ रिश्ते है शायद

हंसी के कुछ पल है शायद...

जिनकी याद से ये आँखे नम हो जाती है

यर रूह थम सी जाती है...

वो पल जो हमने यूँही गवा दिए

कीमत जिनकी बयान न हो सके

रेत समझ हमने यूँही बहा दिए...

वो लब्ज़ कडवाहट के अब चोट पहुचाते है

काश उनमे मोहब्बत के रंग भरे होते..

उस बेरुखी की वजह अब धुन्दला सी गई है

अब वो बेरुखी ही बेवजह सी लगती है...

एक आरज़ू दिल में खटकती है

उन लम्हों को फिर से जीने की...

उन रिश्तो को समेटने की

उस हंसी को कैद करने की...

ALWAYS THE EXCEPTION....

From the ignorance we shared in 6^th to the friendship we had in 11^th,

From the bond we started in 12^th till now…

He’s the person, I know, I’ve truly gained in my life, my best friend a.k.a. my brother…from all those ‘high-level talks’ to hour-long ‘pravachans’… from fighting over a year old mistake to some crazy future plannings…from politics to crushes, we’ve discussed and shared it all…

He irritates me when trying to inspire, makes me cry when he’s supposedly joking, and sounds hilarious to me while discussing his sorrow…yepp!! The most uncommon element of my life…
the best part being when he’s concerned when I least expects it, yet wants it the most….

He’s the exception of my life (accidentally..) coz every time I shut the world out, he somehow finds a key to unlock or even a window…being my critic (24X7!!), to a shoulder to cry on : )

It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known someone, the important part being if it’s worth knowing till the end…

Cherishing all the memories we’ve shared & hoping to make many more…

I wish him the best on his birthday!!
may he get all he deserve and desire…..

that face :) :(

The eternal smile fascinates me

And reminds me of life’s ecstasy

The enchanting smile & mesmerizing glow

That faces puts up for a great show

It’ll fall and wound itself

But that face will never tell its pain

That painted smile will hide it all

Audience’s clap and laugh is all he gain

Only if they looked close enough

Into his soul through its eyes

The tear it hides, the sting it holds

But they are only spectators

They neither will see nor will feel

The soreness of his heart

The intention is to entertain

To make them laugh on jokes & clap on tricks

And not to share its sorrow

It’s a replica of life & living

Teaching us how to survive

Be an audience and look around

Let go of all the grief you may have

Merely observe the joy it holds

Be that face to an bystander

 Which holds that charming smile

While struggling through life’s ache…

unfinished rhymes....

Feelings of the heart untold

Mystery behind those eyes

Emptiness of soul if looked deep inside

No one knows what essence hides...

Tampered to the core with worldly desires

With profuse goals & dreams

Still heart seize some unfinished rhymes

to complete the reason of my being...

Heart contains the expressions

Soul still questioning the melody

Life seems like a puzzle unsolved

Have some pieces missing...

Searching for the lyrics

Love is what eyes behold

Felt its presence

In dreams and in fiction

But my heart still untouched

And heart filled with some unfinished rhymes...